Five00-11

Close Encounters of Third Kind

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“ What !” I was surprised when my spouse of thirty years suddenly declared that she wanted to learn driving.
‘ Now don’t look surprised. You had always insisted that I should learn driving.”
“Yes I did, but that was years ago.” I checked myself from uttering, “ I didn’t know you then.”
Crockery had a way of slipping down from her hands. Vases tumbled down even when she seemed  to be at a safe distance. I was scared of driving myself when she was with me. Only God could know her next move.
But how could I refuse her !
I started training her with a palpitating heart. On the seventh day she insisted on taking charge of the steering wheel all alone .Reluctantly, I let her go ,while I stood at the side of the road. Hardly a minute had passed when I heard a crash.I ran towards the direction.
A crowd had assembled at the spot . A huge carrier truck had a abrased and ripped one side of  my car, luckily she was safe.
I was sure that she wouldn’t think of driving again.
But I was wrong.
“ You t took me to a crowded road in place of an open area.” She complained.
“There are no open areas left in the city.”
“ Why not go to your village ? Roads along the fields are quite wide. Moreover, there is no traffic.”
I had to agree.
My ordeal started once again. We took the car to a wide road near the fields.
Within a few hours of practice she decided to take charge.” Don’t worry” she convinced me .” There is no traffic here, so no fear.”
After she had taken a few rounds, I was a bit relaxed .Then I heard a loud thud. The car had fallen into the feeder channel that run along the fields and turned turtle.There  was no water in it at that time. I stood there trembling . But to my utter relief,she came out unscathed from the inverted vehicle.
“ You sure will give me a heart attack! “ I told her. “ Now forget about driving.”
But the craze was still upon her. This time she was able to coax her friend. They chose Burlton Park  for practice.Every thing went perfectly well for the time being.She glorified her friend and taunted me for being a useless trainer. Till one day———
Flustered and agitated,she entered home and started crying. I panicked and  tried to calm her down,” Are you O.K ?”
“ I don’t know when that old man came out of bushes !”
“ What ! Did you run over a man,  is he alive ?”
“ Nothing happened to him . I was able to apply brakes just in time.But I will never drive again!’
I exhaled with relief . “ What then  ?”
“ That man hurled choicest Punjabi cuss words on us for full one hour,”
She was mortified beyond repair.

[zombify_post]

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  1. Hilarious! This reminds me of my own learning days when my brother tried his level best to teach me how to ride a geared bike but gave after a couple of weeks. I still can’t ride them ?
    And yes, Punjabi cuss words are perfectly capable of casting that spell on anyone (who understands the language, of course!)