The Terrible Twos

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Madame Flaubert: Welcome to the house of Flaubert, where you can learn about anything you want under the firmament; from your deepest desires to the most mind-boggling questions.

Alicia: We have heard that you can talk to spirits. Is that right?

Martha: C’mon Ali, this place is giving me the creeps. I think something is moving in that tank!

Alicia: No, not until I get some answers. I have tried everything I could for years, but now I’m completely wabbit.

Flaubert: I can tell from your pulsating auras that you two are very troubled souls. A childhood trauma perhaps? Something about your mother?

Martha: Oh, that’s genius work.

Alicia: Why don’t we just let her try?

Flaubert: Yes, but before you sit just drop 50 bucks into that jar. Sorry, it’s a business after all. I can’t always work quid pro quo, huh?

Martha: I know I’m going to regret this. Flaubert: Good. Why don’t you take a seat and let’s hold hands like in a circle? That’s right. I can already feel all the anger and frustration. Hmm, let’s see. So your mother. What happened to her?

Martha: I thought you knew everything.

Alicia: Hush. She was murdered. We were very young. But the police never found anything and just gave up. I decided to search for answers myself.

Flaubert: Don’t tell me more. Now, let’s see. Your mother seems like she was a lovely woman. Hmmm. Yes, yes I sense something. I think she’s here with us. Don’t let go of your hands. Dorothy, aren’t you? Are you able to hear us?

Alicia: I… I think I felt something. Why is it so chilly?

Martha: I can’t believe I’m falling for this crap. Ali, are you… are you all right?

Flaubert: No, no, don’t move. She’s almost here. Dorothy, show us. Give us a sign. Tell us that you can hear us.

Alicia: Ah! Stop with all this noise! No rest can I get even after death.

Martha: What’s wrong with your voice?

Flaubert: Dorothy? Dorothy, is that you?

Ali/Dor: Of course, who else will it be? Oh my, Martha. You have grown so big.

Martha: Oh mom, who killed you?

Ali/Dor: Well, you two did, didn’t you?

Martha: What did we do?

Ali/Dor: Well if it wasn’t for both of you bickering all day, I would have been alive. You were driving me crazy, I felt like taking a machete and hacking you two myself. But I couldn’t, so I decided to leave and get some peace of mind. It’s just my luck that I met a mad homeless guy on the way. He didn’t believe me when I said I had no money.

Martha: That’s it?

Ali/Dor: Yes. I’m angrier at you two than that poor guy. Now let me stay dead in peace. I’m going to go now.

Martha: Mom? Ali? What’s happening?

Flaubert: She’s gone. Your sister will wake up soon. Thank you for visiting. Do come again.

 


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